I’ve had this conversation with two people this last week, and because I’ve had it on my mind I thought I would write it out. Being in pain from life situations is such a good place to be in. There are a lot of things that cause pain in life, and being able to walk through those times is so beautiful. We know that when we get through it, we will be changed. It’s how we change that we get to determine as we walk through the process.
When we walk through pain we have so many reasons to give up, to numb ourselves, or to become less of a person by being really uncomfortable, maybe even giving in to acting different than we are worth just to get by.
A friend once taught me that sitting in uncomfortable situations was so powerful, because it teaches you to be okay no matter where you find yourself. That you are still in control of your reactions and how you handle the moment. At the time, just the thought of staying in an uncomfortable situation would stress me out so much that I could barely believe him. When I actually allowed myself to sit in the awkwardness of uncomfortable situations, I found that I was teaching my heart to relax in stressful moments, I was teaching my body that it was okay to feel what it was feeling and I was informing my soul that it could be at peace no matter how it felt at the time.
I challenged myself to take deep breaths, soak in the moment and feel every feeling so I could work through it instead of around it. Now, when I find myself going through a time that feels really uncomfortable or painful, I don’t feel as scared with not knowing the outcome. I trust that I will work through it to the best of my ability.
Sometimes what we want is to always know how things will turn out, but how does that teach us patience, grace, or trust? If we know at the beginning of a relationship that they will cheat or leave us, we wouldn’t go into it. But then we also wouldn’t learn to grow in love when it hurts, or to work through deep pain and problems which grow us as a person. Nobody wants deep pain in their lives, but everybody has to go through it, it’s what makes this life and our world what it is. You have the people who run from the pain and don’t feel anything at all. You have the people who let the pain rule their life and never move on to what they are supposed to be. And you have the people who feel the pain, understand that it doesn’t control their lives, work through it and become better and more helpful people who end up making their life what it deserves to be.
I strive to be someone who works through pain in such a way that it actually changes me, grows me, and helps me become a person that is fearless of new things and uncomfortable situations. The possibility that it could be the greatest adventure of my life fuels me to work through every pain that comes my way.
Pain is what makes us human, makes us know that we are capable of feeling love and kindness. Pain comes from feeling, and feelings drive us to be either great or wicked people. Pain tells us that we are alive.